...

As I roll over to the other side of the bed and stretch my arms for you just to grasp some cold, night air, I feel a overwhelming desire to get back to the days of longing for one sight of you and nights that unraveled mysteries . I want to go back to the roofs under which we took cover from moonlight and left the windows open to tell our stories to the other part of the night which eagerly waited and sent its spy - breeze to know what happened inside; to see our shadows as they try in vain to imitate us just to find out what is it that we share and ending up as dark as ever! I want to overpower this cold, ruthless reality of your absence, run into your warm arms and thank the thin air I hugged all these days.

lessons!

Its high time I learnt a few things:


1. MATLAB. I am going at real slow pace! need to buck up or even God wont save me!

2. I gotta start thinking. I somehow dont think much. As a obvious consequence I mess up a hell lot! Need to improve.

 3. I gotta learn to keep promises. Especially the ones I make to myself. ( I recently broke a bigtime promise to self! and feeling terribly bitter about it.)

4. I gotta speak up! Be more confident!

5. I have to stand up for myself; atleast when I know I am right!

6. I gotta eat more and feel better!

7. I gotta have some patience and I gotta listen more.. (contradictory, I know! but well :) )

8. I have to use my time better! shit! I have already wasted so much time and I still do so!

9. I have to learn to have  a plan B!

10. I have got to stop being so stupidly stubborn. If I wanna get better, I have to learn to accept that I am wrong and accept it humbly!

11. The most important of all: I gotta learn how to JFDI! I am as bad as you can imagine at getting things done or doing things or whatever!  This is something so damn important in life and I possess the least of this!

That says, time to get going!

 See ya! 'll try to keep you posted regarding this :)

Thank you..

Huh! what a month it has been!
So many feelings!

Happiness, encouragement, dullness, sadness, boredom, frustration, tears, anger, dejection, rejection, encouragement, turmoil, acceptance, sarcasm, distrust, misuse, more tears, disheartening, hope, love, pleasure, high, lethargy, attachment, detatchment, craze, fun, enjoyment, memories, repentance, stress, pressure....

Yesterday, as I sat down and went through project presentation and changed the extensions and mailed it to my project-mates, I just remembered how long it had been since we all friends had a good time together. Time took away with it a lot of things.

I still remember how all the professors in the department had come to our 3rd sem class and introduced themselves and wished us luck and gave some mini lectures on behaviour and attendance. Three years have passed since. That was the time when we were making friends in the new crowd, creating a identiy.Those classes with full strength in third semester, when the benches were not suffecient and peon had to arrange for extra chairs - nope, they dont exist now- all have been replaced by dusty ones.. Mass-bunk was a new term! Bunking a senior professors class was offence! When I come to think of it now, I think fun lied there, then. I miss the times when we waited in the corridors for the next professor to come; when bunking meant once in a while and break meant : go and come back to class! not just go, get lost!

I liked standing in cafe and drinking coffee in light mood with my friends; the times when we just ate and at the end one or two people ended up paying for all;  those golden little trips of ours - which were decided on a fly- vtu, Vyjnath,tank and even Shiroda; the times when a person came late to college and forced everybody who came later to bunk the class; the times when one person just mentioned movie name and all end up in theatre instead of a lecture!; those stupid gossips; those visits to Cafe Ajanta for neer dosa and toast; the morning walks and laughs; the carefree chatter and a little jokes turned most of us rolling on floor, laughing; the times sitting in front of the dot matrix printer and taking printouts for all; the lunches in Hotel Panchamrut; sitting in Entrepreneurship and Management class and dying to impress that lecturer; cribbing about Prof.Madi and complaining and fighting with him; when we decided if we should go to class depending on the crowd in juice centre and cafe; ten people crammed into a table of four in canteen for breakfast; when the person who got tea never got a sip; when we fought for a glass of banana shake; when one gave a hundred rupee note for a thirty-rupee-per-head bill and got only ten bucks back!; the frustrated lab sessions; the silly but funny gossip..
I miss grabbing and fight for a single bite of Vasu's tiffin (of which she never got a bit!); poo's narration of "Nid-dhant" incidents ; Peets' - Mithun PJ's; the smile that Vinay and Shirish's little blunders and jokes brought; Shrawan's stories and charm; shweth's silent smiles and angers :)... I miss those damn days filled with laughter; those stupid days when there was no big reason to laugh; no big reason to meet; no reason to celbrate; no reason to go out and drink a cup of tea..

I never thought all those little things had made so much difference to my life and how I see my class, my people in college... These empty classes, canteen and cafe; no laughter; creases of worries on every forehead! All I hear is "has your implementation started?", "your seminar is selected??!", "my guide's angry".. " who's your examiner?" .. "whats your seminar topic?"... frustrate me.. get me craving to see a genuine smile on a face...

To the list of my feelings, here I add: Nostalgia..

And I dedicate this post to ALL the people who are the reason for so many memories and smiles: Peets, Vassu, Poo, Shweth, Mith, Shrawan, Vinay, Shirish, Prati, Pratima, Iesh, Anu, Shwetha and Shwetha H... To those people who have no idea they'll live in my memory: KKT sir, Rodd sir, Math Sir, Madi sir, Anjana(Go-mata!), Sabde sir, Gudi sir, Seema ma'm, AHK and Upparmani sir, Rajesh Joshi sir,  and on goes this list. And to all those little "fun weekends ;)" that happened in this city!

Thanks to all you guys, who made my stay in this city golden;  for the soo much love; you got me smiling when I was low even without asking; you made me feel at home; you have made life here fun; thanks so much .. for making  a mark in my life; for leaving me those platinum moments of happiness..

Well, yeah.. I will move on but you have already made the differece :)

50/-

'Ahh... Its 9:30! why the hell dint i get some change!', I muttered under my breath, frustrated.

I had been standing in front of this building, where I was supposed to attend a job interview in a short while, for fifteen minutes stopping every passerby asking for change of a 500 rupees note, to pay the auto rickshaw driver.

'OK! A bad luck morning!', thought I, owing to the fact that I had missed the bus even after bieng at the bus stop five minutes early! (the bus had managed to turn up earlier than usual) and a auto-ride in the heavy morning traffic and then, this annoyance.. and I was pretty sure that I was going to be late to the interview... 'I'm asking this one last somebody for change', I decided,looking at the guy who was coming, 'or I am sending this guy back with the 500..'.

“Excuse me..”, I called out.

“yes?”, said the guy, turning his black, radiant eyes towards me.

“I need a help.. Er... do you have change for 500 bucks?..”

He took out his shiny, brown, leather wallet and searched thorougly (ah, with the number of partitions and parts the wallet had, it definitely took searching!) and said “ sorry! I dont think I've....”

'damn it' I thought.. and said aloud “oh, its alrite...anyway, thanks!” and took out my note with a lot of pain and turned towards the driver.

I realized that the guy was still standing there. Wondering, what might have gone wrong, I turned to say something.. But the guy asked “ er.. you gotta pay the guy? How much do you need?!”

I was surprised, intrigued, relieved, all at the same time. “ 50 bucks!”, words came out of mouth even before I realized what the question meant!

“ Oh, cool.. I have change, I'll pay for you now, you can pay me back later...”...

'what! Well.. err... what do I do... he's a stranger, mmm.. no, i shouldnt be taking.. but 500? mm.. and he looks decent.. and ...' I was thinking.. and this guy probably read me..

He said again ,“Take it, fine by me!”. I was skeptical..

“Mm... May I have your visiting card please?” He was digging his wallet again.

I, now noticed the blue jeans, black (wrinkleless) shirt, the semi formal brown shoes, a red swiss knife hanging by the right pocket of jeans and you just couldnt miss the air of confidence, the swift, smart movements and a sudden feeling of relief..

I was almost lost for a second! He held his card out and as I took the card and was about to say something, he was talking again, “ its okay... gimme later.” said he, and thrust a fifty note into my hand .

I dint know how to thank him.. 'Thank god I met this guy!', I thought!

“Thanks so much!!”, I said with a sigh of relief and a big smile and turned to the driver to pay the money and once done, “I dont know how....” .. Damn! He was going! I called... “hey! Excuse me! the money! Pay back! Wait... I am ... what ... shit! No!” but yes, he was gone! He had not waited ; not until I paid for the auto; not to hear out my thanks; not even for the money!At the least, He hadn't even asked my NAME, for god's sake!!!

How could he trust me (nope, its not just 50 bucks! Nobody had offered me that till then!) ?! How was I just convinced that I should let somebody pay for me!?!!! How do I pay him back? What ..... i rushed into the interview hall with all these questions in my head...

Well...

Now, a week later, I smile, remembering the overpowering charm of his.. and looking at the appointment letter I recieved a while ago and the visiting card, I wonder, how should I pay back a favour thats more than just 50 bucks? 

PS: this is an incident that happened with a friend of mine. I am just portraying the other side.

PPS: The post I promised for valentine's day is still pending, I know :( Somehow, the mood is not right. But, it'll come!

PPPS: Please suggest a good title for this post.. I am so bad at it!

ಅಭಿಪ್ರಾಯ ..

ಹವ್ಯಕ ವಧುಗಳ ಕೊರತೆಯ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ನಿನ್ನೆ ಓದಿದ ಲೇಖನದ ಕುರಿತು ನನ್ನ ಅಭಿಪ್ರಾಯ :

 "ಮನೆಯಲ್ಲಿರುವ" ಹುಡುಗರ ಬಗ್ಗೆ:

ಓದಿನಲ್ಲಿ ಬುದ್ಧಿವಂತರು, ಕಲೆ, ಸಾಹಿತ್ಯ, ಮತ್ತಿನ್ಯಾವುದರಲ್ಲಾದರೂ ಆಸಕ್ತಿ ಇರುವವರು, ಸ್ವಲ್ಪ ಮಟ್ಟಿಗೆ ದುಡ್ಡು, ಹೆಸರು ಮಾಡಬೇಕೆಂದಿರುವವರು ಪೇಟೆ ಸೇರಿಕೊಂಡಿರುತ್ತಾರೆ..
ಮನೆಯಲ್ಲಿರುವ ಯುವಕರು, ಪಿತ್ರಾರ್ಜಿತವಾಗಿ ಬಂದ ಅಡಿಕೆ ತೋಟ ನೋಡಿಕೊಂಡು ಹಳ್ಳಿ ಕಡೆ - ಹರಟೆ ಹೊಡೆಯುತ್ತ, ಗುಠಕಾ ಜಗಿಯುತ್ತಾ, ಆಗಹೋಗದ ರಾಜಕೀಯವೋ, ಗಾಸಿಪ್ಪೋ ಮಾಡುತ್ತ ಕಾಲಹರಣ ಮಾಡುವವರೇ ಹೆಚ್ಚು. ಇಂಥವರಿಗೆ, ನೀವು ನಿಮ್ಮ ಮಗಳನ್ನು ಕೊಟ್ಟೀರ?  

ನಾವು ಹುಡುಗಿಯರೂ  ಸುತ್ತ ಮುತ್ತ ಇಂಥವರನ್ನು ನೋಡಿರುತ್ತೇವೆ. ನಮ್ಮನ್ನು ಬೇರೆ ಒಳ್ಳೆಯ ಅವಕಾಶಗಳು ಇರುವಾಗ, ಬರೀ ಹವ್ಯಕರಲ್ಲ ಎಂದು ಬಿಟ್ಟುಬಿಡುವುದು ಸರಿಯೇ? ಅಷ್ಟಕ್ಕೂ, ನನಗೆ ಗೊತ್ತಿರುವಂತೆ, "ಸಾಕಷ್ಟು ಓದಿರುವ, ಉತ್ತಮ ಉದ್ಯೋಗದಲ್ಲಿರುವ" ಯುವಕರಾರಿಗೂ ವಧು ಸಿಗದೇ ಹೋಗಿಲ್ಲ. ಹಾಗೇನಾದರು ಇದ್ದರೆ,  ಅಂಥ ಯುವಕರೇ ಕೊಂಚ ಚೂಸಿಯಾಗಿರುತ್ತಾರೆ. ಹಾಗೂ, ಇಂಥ ಯುವಕರು ಚಟರ್ಜೀಗಳನ್ನ, ಪಟೇಲ್ ಗಳನ್ನ ಮದುವೆಯಾಗಿರುವ ಸಾಕಷ್ಟು ಉದಾಹರಣೆಗಳಿವೆ. 

ಇನ್ನೊಂದು ಕಡೆ, ಇದೆಲ್ಲ ಬಿಟ್ಟು, ಹಳ್ಳಿ ಕಡೆ ಹುಡುಗರನ್ನು , ಹವ್ಯಕರೆಂದು ಮದುವೆಯಾದರೆ, ಸಿಗುವುದೇನು? ಮುಂದೆ ಓದಲಾಗುವುದಿಲ್ಲ, ನಮ್ಮ ಮಹತ್ವಾಕಂಕ್ಷೆಗಳಿಗೆ ಬೆಲೆ ಕಡಿಮೆ, talent ಗೆ  ಬೆಲೆ ಇಲ್ಲವೇ ಇಲ್ಲ, ಬದುಕು ಹಳ್ಳಿಯ ಒಂದು ಮನೆಯ ಸುತ್ತ ಮಾತ್ರ ಗಿರಕಿ ಹೊಡೆಯುತ್ತದೆ, ದೇಶ ಸುತ್ತುವ, ಕೋಶ ಓದುವ ಅವಕಾಶಗಳೂ limited .

ಹೀಗಂತ ನಮ್ಮ ಹಳ್ಳಿ-ಕಡೆ ಯುವಕರು ಮದುವೆಯೇ ಆಗಬಾರದೆಂದು ಹೇಳುತ್ತಿಲ್ಲ. ಆದರೆ, ತಮಗೆ ವಧುಗಳಿಲ್ಲ ಎಂದು ಹೇಳುವ ಮೊದಲು, ಅವರಿಗೇನು ಬೇಕು ಎಂದು ಯಾಕೆ ನೋಡಬಾರದು?

ಅಡಿಕೆ ಬೆಳೆಯುವವರಿಗೆ, ನನಗೆ ತಿಳಿದಿರುವಂತೆ, ನಾಲ್ಕೈದು ತಿಂಗಳು ಮಾತ್ರ ಹೆಚ್ಚು ಕೆಲಸವಿರುತ್ತದೆ. ಉಳಿದ ಸಮಯವನ್ನು  ಬೇರೆ constructive ಕೆಲಸಗಳಲ್ಲಿ - ಸಣ್ಣ ಉದ್ಯಮ, seasonal ಆದರೂ ಲಾಭದಾಯಕವಾದುದನ್ನು ಬೆಳೆಯುವುದು ಅಥವಾ ಅಂಥ ಬೆಳೆಗಳ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಮಾಹಿತಿ ಸಂಗ್ರಹ, ಇರುವುದರಲ್ಲೇ ಬೆಳೆಯನ್ನು  maximize ಮಾಡುವುದು , ಓದು, ಬರವಣಿಗೆ ಮುಂತಾದವುಗಳಲ್ಲಿ ತೊಡಗಿಸಿಕೊಳ್ಳಬಹುದು.

ಇಂದಿನ ಹೆಣ್ಣುಮಕ್ಕಳಿಗೆ , ಹಳ್ಳಿಯೋ ದಿಲ್ಲಿಯೋ ಎಂಬುದಕ್ಕಿಂತ ಮುಖ್ಯ ಹುಡುಗ ಎಷ್ಟು capable , ಹೊಸದೇನಾದರೂ ಇವನಲ್ಲಿದೆಯೇ, ಎಷ್ಟು methodical ,  ಏನನ್ನಾದರೂ ಸಾಧಿಸುವ ಛಲ, ಹಠ ಇದೆಯೇ, ಈಗಲ್ಲದಿದ್ದರೂ,ಮುಂದೊಂದು ದಿನ ಸಮಾಜದಲ್ಲಿ, ಗೌರವ, ಹೆಸರು ಗಳಿಸಬಲ್ಲವನೆ, ನಾವು ಒಬ್ಬರಿಗೊಬ್ಬರು ತಕ್ಕವರೇ, ಇಂಥವು ಮುಖ್ಯವಾಗುತ್ತವೆ .

ಇಂಥವರಿಗೂ ವಧು ಸಿಗದೇ ಹೋದರೆ, ಆಗ, ಲೇಖಕರ ದೃಷ್ಟಿ ಕೋನ ಸರಿ..

ಯೋಚಿಸಿ ನೋಡಿ..

PS : ಕನ್ನಡ ಬರವಣಿಗೆಗೆ  ನಾನು ಹೊಸಬಳು. ತಪ್ಪುಗಳನ್ನು , ಕ್ಷಮಿಸಿ, ತಿದ್ದಿ .

Laugh it off :)

Alright :) This time, its certain funny usage and pronunciations of English I have come across in my Engineering life and most of these from my lecturers ! Here we go:

1. 
   
   This professor of mine, I guess she has no idea there are plurals of nouns in languages. She made a classic statement after her first lecture and said “ You all senior should guide all you junior!”
   
   
2. 
   
   Another one, whose pronunciations,lets say, are a bit different, addressed to a bunch of students carrying out a experiment that the model they were using was inappropriate for the experiment. To put it in his words - “ your model ij not shootable for the experiment!” 
   
   
3. 
   
   Here is one more : when class was constantly being disturbed by students (late-comers, coloquially!) asking permission to enter the class, this lecturer says - “In one Hour class, fifty minutes I do Come in, come it and then, I go out!!” !!! well this is a blunder!!
   
   
4. 
   
   Take this: When a student failed to come up with a right definition for a technical term, the professor (lets say Ashok Saxena?? ) was trying to tell him about the definition “ look, definition need not be technical! Explain in layman words, but in short.. For example, Define Ashok Saxena in one word?...” before he could compelte the sentence,  “ A**h****!”, came the immediate answer (as a murmur, though!) ! You can predict the reaction of the rest of class!
   
   
5. 
   
   Try this: This professor was talking about safety and insurence, etc.. He says, “ Lets say, your house is fired! But 75% of it will not get no fired!!” .. Good lord!! they speak this??!
   
   
6. 
   
   There are special ways some professors have, to say things! (just like the sentence I used now).. like: “ The item has been not purchased!” and “One thousands rupees!”  and "morning-morning, even you get bored to attend" !
   
   
7. 
   
   This one: There was a new LCD projector installed in the class and this professor puts his laptop on, which is connected to the LCD and looks at the screen and asks “you will all see?? its a bit dull, so aksed!” (its aksed and not asked! ) * rofl * 
   
   
8. 
   
   And here comes the best one: Three students causing racket in class and lecturer is pissed off. He asks these three guys to stand up and says angrily, 
   “Both of you three, get lost of my class!!” ;) 

Well, thats all for now !

Till next one!

PS:My My second post for this month was intended to be a nice, sweet, love-filled valentine special! But unfortunately, for the time being, I am too preoccupied with a lot of other things, basically academics and this post was due for a very long time, which came in very handy! But promise, before the month of romance ends, one will surely be here :)

PPS: The above mentioned incidents have happened with me! and By the way, No offence intended! After all, Its because of such things, we don't doze off in the lecutres! 

PPS: Feel free to add your experiences by commenting!

!

Whoops!

Sorry for the loooong gap :)

Unfortunately enough, for last few days, I have sincerely tried to come up with some decent post and failed miserably! So (stealing a friend's idea ;) ) decided to showcase the little interest I have in photography. Here, I present one of my recent clicks and one of my favourites..

PS: Again, I had no idea what to title it! ideas, welcome!